last five entries

host - email - older- newest - profile - notes

How to deal with rejection, or how to help others deal with it

2013-03-25 - 9:43 p.m.

So there was this really cute little house that we saw last week and wanted to rent it. Then we went to see another one that was twice it�s size, but this one was the first, so I guess you could say we wanted both houses. They were only right down the street from each other. We didn�t get the really cute little house, because according to the owner�s email today,

�Unfortunately there was somebody with more than adequate qualification ahead of your submittal�.

He went on to say he was really sorry, and a bunch of other stuff you say to people who win the ribbon with no writing on it. He certainly could have toned it down a little. Or he could have torqued it up, and really - it would have sounded just as bad.

�Unfortunately for you, there was a very special somebody with yards of great credit, a mayor�s charm, a smile made of candy and a very toned abdomen. This, my fair-weathered friends, far surpassed your little novice application, what with its atrophied sides and dog-chewed corners.�

He then asked if we wanted our check back for $20. (s�cuse me...it was $25 in cash, and no, we don�t want it back). We�ll just taunt your tenant with bad energy from the other house down the street if we don�t get turned down for that one too, is all. He�s actually very nice in reality, but his delivery could use some finessing. It got me thinking just how important it is to not only deal well with rejection, but to dole it out nicely to others, too. So, below are all the ways I made things worse for others this week, and what I could�ve done instead:

Situation:

My husband hurt his knee

Ideal solution:

Offer to find pain medicine, a doctor or simply offer some kindness.

My solution:

Within 30 seconds of the injury, I joked he might want to invest in a cane, which made him question my ethics.

Situation:

Client lost her job and said she had been crying most of the week.

Ideal solution:

Send her a card and ask what I can do to help.

My solution: sent her a humorous book in the mail, and when my Director of Ops excitedly asked me the name of the book and I told him the title (which starts with the word �Terminated�), I didn�t hear back from him.

Dilemma: Invited to go to Catholic church with a new (iffy) casual acquaintance.

Ideal solution: tell her that I had some bad experiences with Catholicism, politely decline.

My solution: pretend I didn�t hear her both times she asked.

Situation: a �homeowner� claiming to be dying in a hospital emailed me back about a house I sent a request on, and then requested a payment of $500 up front.

Ideal solution: ignore the email. Or respond back that it was illegal to ask people for money without actually physically showing the house.

My solution: emailed him a three paragraph manifesto about the state of his karma, including the line �...but somewhere in your mind you'll feel like you don't deserve it, and nothing will change.�

I�m very good at suggestions where others are concerned, it�s just my methodology for solutions tend to point toward the low road sometimes.

Finally, how to balance your own karma, at least back to honorable mention:

1) Confide in at least one person that you�d like to be a better person, even if you only mean it in that one moment.

2) go on Facebook and watch one of the cat videos people keep insist on posting.

3) Think about someone who is terrible and unlovable, and then compare yourself to them; feel redeemed.

previous - next