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surprise

2005-07-07 - quitting time

This is what I've been subject to at work lately:

Jenny: I licked this envelope myself! Mmmm my favorite flavor!

Bobbie: It's only Monday, four more to go!

Lyndie: Who left these Boston Terrier calendars out on the table for anyone to take them?

Ohell: Someone with good sense I think.

Lyndie: Can I take one?

Ohell: Take it, see if I care.

Bobbie: My daughter's school is selling candy! Who wants to sponsor her?

Lyndie: Oh, how cute!

Jerrie: Yes, how cute, what kind?

Bobbie: Peanut brittle. That's it. And wrapping paper.

Jerrie: Bobbie, what does your sweatshirt say?

Bobbie: Oh, you like it? It says "Sorry that you don't like my cattitude!"

Jerrie: Cute!

That isn't why I'm leaving, but I'm leaving. Tomorrow is my last day. FOREVER.

**************************

On an unrelated thing, I got a phone call from my little brother a few weeks ago at work, and he said he'd go to a meeting with me whenever I was ready. Ha, that's funny, I thought, I've only been waiting like 6 years for you to take one sober breath so I could go with you to a meeting. So I called his bluff, and he said ok pick me up tonight. I half believed him. But I drove to Hollywood and goddamn it, he got in my car.

I still didn't believe it. I figured he wanted money. But he never asked me for any. My sober friend Bill called and asked if I wanted him to meet us there. As a matter of fact, yes. So he met us there. It was a speaker meeting, where speaker #1 couldn't hold your attention with a gun. I sat behind my brother and kept checking to see if he was listening. He was. In between putting his head in his hands.

I quit sugar again and brought a handful of oatmeal cookie pies, because my brother said he was very hungry. I gave them to him, and he said thanks, and ate all of them at once.

Last week I got a five minute guitar solo from my brother on my voicemail. He hasn't done that in a very long time. He pretends he's live on stage and I'm the audience. He asked Bill to sponsor him. I'm beside myself. Bill said, did you know he was shooting speed for a year? No I didn't, but does it matter?

I called Rob the other morning and he said he was on his way to work. Work? During the day!

I don't want to get too excited but today I didn't once think about his funeral. I thought about the goodbye party I'm getting tomorrow. Because I practically planned it.

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