last five entries

host - email - older- newest - profile - notes

the Zen riders

2004-07-05 - I swear it's not too late

What ever happened to Four Non Blondes, the hair pic, and the 200 cans of corn everyone stockpiled just before the new millenium happened?

I'm not keen on the 4th of July, just like New Year's Eve, where you prepare yourself all for one little nervous minute. 4th of July is not for

dogs

new babies

the (some) elderly

migraine sufferers

me

It is for

numbed out lovers

people in a daze

people who love it

people who don't like to talk, but like to watch

kids

It's not at all that I don't like pretty fireworks, it's only that they all look the same. For two days before and about three weeks after, everyone in the godabt neighborhood is setting off M80's, which have as much purpose in life as fruit flies do.

I think this is going to be a summer of movies up the ying. Napoleon Dynamite was so funny I'll see it again. Everyone was laughing so hard in the theater I felt closer to the audience by the time it ended. We saw my friend Michael outside when it was over and he said he didn't like it much and that he thought it was dorky. Hey screw you Michael!

* note: Michael just emailed me a Photoshop image of a cartoon burger with monkeys, pandas and lions in the burger. It said 'for every animal you don't eat I'm going to eat three'.

I stopped by the raw house the other night to meet a couple of people there, who weren't there (yet) but I didn't know if they were coming, so Millenium (think Jesus/Charles Manson) and Don, the owner of the house (think 72, looks not 72,long hair like Millenium, but white) asked if I would like to go for a ride with them. A bicycle ride. My head screamed THAT'S QUEER! But my mouth found itself agreeing. I really thought twice about it, in my damn flip flops and all. Millenium started to search the house for men's slippers that I could maybe wear. I saw myself slipper tripping, and falling off the bike. Years ago, I insisted on taking a ride on the back of my babysitter's 10 speed, agaist her better wishes, and the only directions she gave me were not to put my feet in the spokes under any circumstances. All she could manage to say was my name, when I leaned over her hospital bed a few hours later.

No, slippers would never work. It would have to be the flippin' flops.

In the first minute the bike hurt my tush. I almost fell, but I did a few wide circles in the street so as to gain tire to road bearings. Don said they were delighted to ride with me, and that it would be enjoyable. I got my sweatshirt out of the car, and pulled the hood far up over my head, until I resembled a raindrop.

Millenium:

"we're gonna have to head up towards the two lights and cross carefully, they do give tickets up ahead, so we need to act as pedestrians and walk the bikes across the crosswalk. Don gets kind of crazy, he'll pretend he's a car, and ride right across! But don't worry, then it's clear, and we can ride up the hill for a while, mostly flat land."

What hill? I said to no one.

By the third wave of leg burning, I settled into a nice high and a calm came over me which enabled me not to react when a car went by and the driver yelled AAAAAAHH!!! at us.

Don said they were jealous that we were having so much fun.

I continuously felt like E.T. in the bicycle scene where he's all swaddled up but being taken care of by the other two. Were there two? Either way.

It's Don and Millenium's mission to educate people on the state of the planet, raw food, and overall love and service. They grow the most amazing fruits and vegetables there, and they aren't gay. Don lost his wife to a very horrible cancer years ago, and while he was her sole caretaker for the time she was at home dying, he tried to get her to change her diet with him so that she could heal. He watched her tumors grow outside her body and inwardly he knew it was made worse by their way of eating. He gave her a health book that she hurled across the room, and after she died fighting, he went raw, and found that he became "less animal, and more human." He tells the story much better than my choppy way, but it's the least I can mention.

I always have questions when I go to their house. I asked at least twenty on the bike ride.

Don:

"Well... It's not like you have to tell anyone really. You've heard of the monkey on one island doing something new and the monkeys on another island begin doing it too? The same thing happens here. "

Millenium pedals up to us again.

"Yes, it's consciousness. It's automatic. Just be an example. Oop, look out here, street's wet a little. Laa laa daa dum."

I told them I still think barbequed meat smells really good.

"Laa daa daa, cake, caake, and steak. Steak steak, and cake, laaaa. But that's ok, it's probably just associated with your memories of it."

Don was also humming, but they appeared to be 1940's love songs which started out Darling, and ended with "the end of tiiime..." He said he wasn't much into movies lately, at my Napoleon Dynamite prompt. Millenium on the cold bust:

"Yes you are, Don. You loved Supersize It, or Me. You loved that movie."

"Well, I didn't love it. I did like it."

"He liked it so much he brought his grandkids back to see it, Ohell."

By the time we headed back downhill, I didn't have to do anymore pedaling, and I don't know why I wasn't biking sooner. Oh I know why. Those tight sassy men's shiny lycra bika shorts. Cringeaholic.

When we landed back on earth, we cut and chopped and grated and pureed. It turns out Blair and Zoran had shown up and left again, and so I called to summon them back. The house had a subtle glow stronger than any time I had been there before. Millenium put the table away and set up the floor around the food, which was glowing brighter than the house. He threw down some pretty cushions, and chopsticks and mats to lie on for a few minutes. We skipped the meditation, which was fine with me.

When the three of us were laying on our mats looking up at the ceiling, Don looked over at me and smiled.

"I just want to tell you how proud of you I am for the changes you've made. You're becoming so much more grounded, and it's just delightful to watch!"

"Yeah Ohell. I've noticed it too. It's really a great thing to see."

I was so genuinely touched.

"You guys have no idea."

We were pretty mellow for the next few minutes, still looking up at the ceiling. I thought about how lucky I was to have had the help from these two for the past couple of years. Millenium showed me a few stretches, and announced his wedding plans in Japan in two weeks. I asked them a few more questions, and then there was a knock at the door.

previous - next