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bagpipe wedding/shower a spider is getting

2004-05-16 - are you kidding?

My girlfriend and me have been sneaking into this hotel pool and using their sun all weekend, it beats the lines at the beach, and the crowd is nice. The pool is behind a gate, which they never lock, thankfully. Yesterday we were there talking with some other people who didn't actually make a hotel reservation either, and we heard some bagpipes blaring pretty loud. Who would interrupt us like this? It was a wedding intro, of all things. White guy and Asian girl. Asian Fusion makes sense, but the bagpipes were needless and confusing, at best. The entire pool crowd got up and watched the ceremony through the gate, it was pretty amusing, and all in all a nice turnout. I clapped the loudest.

My friend Harinam is in L.A. for a few weeks so we hung out a little the other night. Whenever I have anything wrong with me, she sends me to Dr. Mary, who is a chiropractor, but also balances chakras and does muscle testing/energy/whatever work. I never understood exactly what the hell she was trying on me, but I got it that she did, so I let her. I was telling Harinam about a friend of mine who's having some random problem, and she said send him to Dr. Mary, because she also gets rid of "mental stuttering." Allegedly my chakras are balanced from her chakra table, and I couldn't even tell you where any one chakra is located. All I remember from our sessions was that I had this huge lemongrass soup with me last time I was there, and it was too hot so I left it in my car. When I came out it was too cold, so I drank it like a beverage on the way home. All of it, at one time. Who was aware that more soup meant more msg? Who knew some Thai folks were still using msg? I almost passed out while driving, and my breathing "slowed, a little." I was convinced it was Dr. Mary's chakra table for at least a few days.

Last week some time, our VP at work who is a real adult, not a psuedo one, who acts like adults should on all occasions, went crazy and yelled at little Lonnie who works behind me. He called him an asshole and "pal" (not like penpal) and it went on for a few unbearable minutes. Lonnie is passive aggressive, he doesn't yell, but he writes memos about the VP and passes them out to all of us. If he's angry, he just refuses to do stuff. He's been there 25 years. Anyway, Georgie and me were there when the yelling was happening. It was a silly little time, but not for Lonnie. I was so glad I was uninvolved.

Till the following day, naturally. My supervisor wanted me to write out everything that had happened, and everything that I heard. I told her that would be really uncomfortable, as I was sure she'd understand. (my job, the keeping of it) Georgie also wasn't interested in the assignment, she confided in me later, but said she'd do it. So I said I don't like the idea, something general, you know that sort of no. I think I finally got on her bad side, as she queried

"Let me get this right. Are you saying no? Are you telling me no?"

"Umm, I don't like the idea, no not at all. Not good."

"Are you saying no to me, (private ohell)?!"

"That's crazy, I'm not getting involved in that, (captain)."

"I'm trying to help you to save you from having to get involved in ten other fucking meetings about this! Is that what you'd rather, (private)?"

"Yes, I would, and I'll tell them(colonels) no too. I'm not getting involved."

"THEN DON'T! (direct order disobeyed!)"

And clicking shoes walking away was all I heard.

Well did I end up having a miserable day after that at work or what? She wouldn't speak to me for most of the day. Then since my workplace is one most closely resembling a bad family reunion daily, Dedra managed to get me to alienate her as well. It had really happened. I was starting to be an office drama participant, by trying not to participate.

Fortunately, the VP came by and spoke to me, and enlightened me to the idea that sometimes big people don't act like big people and Lonnie pushed his buttons, so what could he do? I said, look if it's all the same to you, I'd rather not be involved, if anyone else is curious. Is that ok with you, you human being you? He said a very relieved yes, of course it is, and we parted ways like two heroes in an abc afterschool special. Then he went into Lonnie's office, and shut the door this time, and they talked, and shook hands like two men that had to.

There's a spider in my shower that I am afraid to go near, and I think he's afraid too. When I turn on the water, he crawls all the way to the top of the ceiling, but still in the shower. That's how you get wet. I told him, we have to stop living like this. If you're not happy here, go. But don't just crawl away and come back when I leave again. On the other hand, if you're happy there, good. But let's make up our minds.

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